February 18, 2011

Someone Stop My Mood Swings

Yesterday, I saw Santa. Don’t believe me? I have photographic evidence!

Exhibit A (the only Exhibit)

In case you didn’t know, Santa is a snowbird and he likes Pizza. I bet they don’t have very many pepperonis at the North Pole, so it makes sense.

I don’t know what to write about, so I will give you some random information about myself.  (You're welcome.)

1. I gave myself food poisoning two Sundays ago. I was too embarrassed to tell my mom this information (now, that’s embarrassed!), but I thought I would share it with the Internet (less embarrassing?). I made myself a tuna sandwich, fully aware that my mayonnaise expired in June. JUNE. Yes, people, that was like half a year ago. Needless to say, I barfed throughout the entire Super Bowl. I held it together enough to watch the commercials, though, don’t you worry.

2. I got stung by a scorpion at my parent’s house on Sunday (maybe Sundays are bad luck?). This little, baby scorpion had obviously spent the night in my shirt. No, that is not cute, it is terrifying. The scary part is he didn’t sting me until I’d been wearing the shirt for like an hour. Can you say, creepy? Luckily, we put some garlic on the sting ASAP and I didn’t feel a thing afterwards. (For your info, garlic is like a magic healing potion.) (And a wonderfully strong perfume, too.  Who would’ve known?)

3. Husband and I are heading to the land of the Mexicans on Saturday, to have our pearly whites worked on. I’m getting a cleaning and he’s getting… well, let’s be honest, he should probably just get a whole new set of teeth. Wish us luck! I googled “Los Algodones murders” and nothing came up, so that made me feel a little bit better.

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